Two haircuts later...
Anyone who found themselves shaking their head at the comments I made about Mormons in my last post will enjoy the rich sauce of irony laid thick on my morning at the hair salon.
A Mormon cut my hair and made me look like a conservative politician's wife. Which made me want to cry. Why do women keep trying to give me bobs that make me look like I should be going door to door about something? I even had pictures with me of my last haircut which was the first good one I've gotten in about two years. She consulted it many times and her interpretations of what she saw leads me to believe that she:
a) is blind as a bat
b) read my earlier post and was getting her revenge for not automatically thinking that all Mormons are the best people on earth.
c) or she's not a very good hair stylist.
Two out of three women working in that salon were Mormons and both of them confirmed that this county is absolutely full of them. You better believe I asked some questions. I found out that only "pure" people get to go on missions, people unsullied by life's temptations. So only virgins are allowed to spread the gospel. Hmm. Interesting. I suppose they can check the women and hopefully take into account that hymens are often not intact due to sporty activity, but how on earth can they be sure the young men are all "pure"? I did ask about men getting their own planet when they die and they said that wasn't really true. Well thank the almighty I got that cleared up!
I had to go immediately to get someone more capable to fix my hair. Although it's much better now (no big shelf in the back of my head), I am tired of bad haircuts and would like to shave off all of my hair. This would unfortunately accentuate my abundantly padded body and make me look like a lesbian pin head. Plus Philip wouldn't like that. It would also show off my scalp which no one but the very brave could look at and not run in fear of getting my leprosy.
I used to have such a good hair life. I guess I should just be glad it lasted so long.
*A commenter in the last post pointed out that everything I said about Mormons was completely wrong. I would like to say for anyone who didn't get this already: I am not an authority on the Mormon religion and am likely to have many misconceptions about them just as most Mormons have automatic misconceptions about me. Maybe if we all keep having dialogs with each other we will come to understand each other better and be more comfortable sharing the planet together while still having different beliefs. This would be nice.
A Mormon cut my hair and made me look like a conservative politician's wife. Which made me want to cry. Why do women keep trying to give me bobs that make me look like I should be going door to door about something? I even had pictures with me of my last haircut which was the first good one I've gotten in about two years. She consulted it many times and her interpretations of what she saw leads me to believe that she:
a) is blind as a bat
b) read my earlier post and was getting her revenge for not automatically thinking that all Mormons are the best people on earth.
c) or she's not a very good hair stylist.
Two out of three women working in that salon were Mormons and both of them confirmed that this county is absolutely full of them. You better believe I asked some questions. I found out that only "pure" people get to go on missions, people unsullied by life's temptations. So only virgins are allowed to spread the gospel. Hmm. Interesting. I suppose they can check the women and hopefully take into account that hymens are often not intact due to sporty activity, but how on earth can they be sure the young men are all "pure"? I did ask about men getting their own planet when they die and they said that wasn't really true. Well thank the almighty I got that cleared up!
I had to go immediately to get someone more capable to fix my hair. Although it's much better now (no big shelf in the back of my head), I am tired of bad haircuts and would like to shave off all of my hair. This would unfortunately accentuate my abundantly padded body and make me look like a lesbian pin head. Plus Philip wouldn't like that. It would also show off my scalp which no one but the very brave could look at and not run in fear of getting my leprosy.
I used to have such a good hair life. I guess I should just be glad it lasted so long.
*A commenter in the last post pointed out that everything I said about Mormons was completely wrong. I would like to say for anyone who didn't get this already: I am not an authority on the Mormon religion and am likely to have many misconceptions about them just as most Mormons have automatic misconceptions about me. Maybe if we all keep having dialogs with each other we will come to understand each other better and be more comfortable sharing the planet together while still having different beliefs. This would be nice.
Labels: bad hair cut